Swinging…. and still missing….

Life is very strange, and nobody should question it. Why? Well, the conundrums that come with it are just almost impossible to solve.

Life has been generous and spicy for me over the last 5 years. I think I have experienced so many emotions in such a short time, that quite often confusion kicks in and I am now not quite sure what I am looking at and how I should react when something is dished out at me.

For example, in 2006, on precisely this day…. I was sitting at the tip of this beach, around the corner of the Blue Lagoon.

This is one of the most beautiful places in the world – Oludeniz, in South West Turkey; I was enjoying what was definitely the best 3 weeks of my life. I was in the company of 3 other people, one of whom I thought was THE ONE. The other two – we became such good friends during the trip, that there was almost no separating us. I actually thought life couldn’t get any better.

Ofcourse, I AM naive!

Positive and negative experiences have followed, but yet again there are hints of something else, and I don’t know how or why to react. It’s the constant curveballs which cloud the vision, or chain of thought; if only one could walk to first base in reality!

Everything feels like a game of football (soccer) at the moment. Sometimes you can just stand around, and out of nothing something happens and you stick the ball into the back of the net – easy. It’s those other times which have made me ponderous. You build up the play, work hard on every move and every pass, sometimes maybe work too hard; and as you hit your shot goalwards while losing your footing and sliding across the floor, you see your effort hit the post and get cleared off the goal line. It’s time like those that you have you hands on your head and eyes on the sky – wishing it was inches the other way.

I can see a move starting again… should I stand in the box, or drop deep in the field passing the ball and making the moves?

Conundrums.

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